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No boyfriend, no worries
Park your third wheel blues!
There has been a question that has plagued me for a number of years now. One that no matter what time of the day, month, or year keeps coming back to the forefront of my thoughts: “Why do I not have a boyfriend?” or “What is wrong with me?”
Many variations on this question exist, and despite friends saying, “Don’t worry. You’re not the only one” to me every time I voiced this question, I never truly believed them. (A difficult piece of guidance to accept when all the friends saying it have boyfriends and are blissfully happy with those boyfriends).
But today, whiling away precious time I should be spending doing some actual study, I browsed forums on the Internet, where quite a few other people have posed a similar question to mine. In all of these forums, the questioner’s peers have obliged in giving advice or consolation to them. Each person had their own opinion and take on the situation due to their principles or experience. As a result of this, there were a variety of responses.
One particular response on one of the forums was a list of thirty possible reasons why a girl couldn’t get a guy. Even these reasons ranged from plausible to implausible. The plausible reasons could be divided into two groups: useful and condescending. Because of this, I felt the need to write about my own experience.
For the last four years, my friends have had to endure me whining about not having a boyfriend, that no guys seem to show the slightest hint of interest towards me, and that mostly it is always one of my friends the guy goes for in the end. But luck was with me last September, when I took a chance on a guy and the guy took a chance on me. The result was that my friends had to listen to me talk about the guy nearly every second of the following days.
I was 20 and he was my first boyfriend, as well as my first kiss. Not to dwell on it now or analyse the past too much (since we are no longer together and I believe in the ‘no regrets’ philosophy of life), but when I told him what I just told you, he was surprised that I had never had a boyfriend before. A reaction that was given towards the girl on the forum I was talking about earlier. To him, I either looked like a girl who had a boyfriend at the time or a girl who would have had boyfriends.
So, single guys and gals out there, think of that next time the majority of your friends are making you feel like a third wheel or another odd number in the group. To people (or an interested person) outside of your group of friends, you might look like a person already taken. Personally, that thought is much better than one of a perceived future of you as being bitter and surrounded by cats. For me, I’ve taken the positive out of my situation. My life can no longer be described by the title of a Drew Barrymore movie: Never Been Kissed.
By: Deirdre Brady
