The road to recovery
True life story: Recovering from mental illness.
I became mentally ill roughly four years ago. It started out as a sensation of fading out of existence. Then there were these false happy times when I would be the life and soul of my party.
There were rough times when I starved myself and had to be force fed. Some people thought I wouldn't come back from my last episode. I was rolling in and out of hospital and no one could stop me. It came to a stage where I had to be arrested and brought to the mental care unit.
No one was going to tell me to do something I didn't want to do, especially when I felt I could take on the world. Hospital time passed and struggle in the real world remained.
I felt like I couldn’t go on: what was the point in living in a dream, a bubble that no one could see inside? Sometimes I felt empty and other times I felt overflowing.
I now feel fresh; like I can tackle problems and be normal again. I feel like I have broken my shell. To get help, I first needed hospital, and then I needed to accept myself for who I was. Now I visit my counsellor and doctor every two weeks.
Telling people what was going through my mind was the hardest part. When I told my family, they looked at me as if I had two heads. When I told my ex-girlfriend she ran away for a week. The only one who listened and completely understood me was my psychiatrist. They hear stories like mine every day, they have no emotions attached and they can give you the care that you need.
Family are great for recovery but when you are ill, your doctor is the best place to turn to. Sometimes, family can really hurt you simply because they do not understand. If I were to give any advice, it would be to choose your friends wisely. They will be there when you need them and if they are the right ones you will feel ‘yourself’ around them. As for your family, they are the ones that will be there when no one else is.
By: Anonymous
This article is part of the SpunOut.ie true life stories section – a space for young people to share their experiences of tough times and encourage others to seek help. This story is just one person's experience and it may be different for you. Remember that no matter what you are going through, there is help and support available. See the Find help section for more information: http://www.spunout.ie/help/
Find supportive information on mental health and information on how to ask for help.
Contact details of support organisations nationwide: www.spunout.ie/help/
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