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Orgasm
All about the big Ooooooohhhhh!
What is an orgasm?
An orgasm is a series of strong, pleasurable contractions felt in the genital and general pelvic area. During orgasm, blood flows to the genitals, and muscles there contract to release the tension. This release of tension feels great. Men release semen at this point and women may also ejaculate fluid from their vagina.
Myths about orgasm:
There are TONS of myths about orgasms, particularly as relates to orgasms in women. The most common myths are:
- A woman must have an orgasm to feel sexually satisfied. - Many/most women want to have an orgasm of course, but many women do not come every single time and they can still enjoy sex. Problems may occur when the woman never or almost ever comes.
- Orgasms during intercourse are far superior to orgasms from foreplay. - This is a myth that both men and women have to deal with. In fact, for women, stimulation of the clitoris is more likely to lead to an orgasm, though some women report that orgasms from sex are more intense. Still others find the exact opposite! Find out for yourself and don’t listen to what others say.
- Condoms can stop you orgasming. - In general, condoms do not interfere with women’s sexual pleasure. In fact, they can make sex last longer and increase a woman’s pleasure. Ribbed ones can also further stimulate women during sex. Condoms may delay a man’s orgasm however, and this bothers some men. There are many different brands available though, so often it just takes experimentation to figure out which ones offer most feeling and sensitivity.
- Penis size effects orgasm. - Now this is a big LIE. Big penises do not always result in great orgasms for women and small penises do not stop a woman from climaxing. The G-Spot is located only about two inches into the vagina, so even a small penis will stimulate it. Plus, for most, good sex includes a lot of foreplay and most women reach orgasm this way.
- There is something wrong with a woman if she does not orgasm every time she has sex. She must be frigid or abnormal or not be happy with her partner. -This is a load of you know what! A woman’s orgasm can be a fickle thing, with a woman having multiple orgasms in one hot and heavy session and none in another. Science has yet to pin down the exact reasons why, but suffice it to say there is nothing wrong with you, your partner, or your relationship, if you do not have an earth shattering orgasm every time.
- People instinctively know how to get their partner to come. - Sadly, this is also not true. What gets you off might be as interesting as watching paint dry to another girl. Everybody is different. You and your partner need to explore it together.
How to get there?
Everyone is different. What gets one person going often does not work so well for another person. This is a very important thing to remember! Experiment and try to have fun with it.
If it’s not happening:
- Firstly, try not to worry. It is very common to have problems reaching orgasm.
- As hard as it is, try not to focus totally on orgasms; instead enjoy the sex for what it is instead of constantly wondering and desperately trying hard to have an orgasm. Trying too hard can really be a problem and can actually prevent you letting go.
- Stop beating yourself up – there is nothing wrong with your body or you mind if you can’t orgasm yet.
- Talk to your partner – let them know about your worries and let them know when they’re doing things right. If something feels good, let your partner know so that he/she will keep on doing it.
- Think about using a sex toy. You could use it alone to help you find what stimulates you and/or with your partner also.
Interesting facts about orgasm:
- Orgasm is a natural painkiller because it causes the release of endorphins (happy chemicals which give you a high and which ease pain).
- These same endorphins are released during exercise, which is why athletes can often play on when injured.
- About one per cent of women can orgasm solely through having their breasts touched.
- The most recorded orgasms in an hour were 134 by one female and sixteen by a male.
- Some people can orgasm without touching their genitals at all!
And remember nothing makes sex hotter than knowing STI’s aren’t in bed with you!
