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Escaping abuse
What to do if you live with violence or abuse.
If you are in an abusive relationship or live with domestic violence then you need to get help and escape from the situation.
- Tell someone you trust about the abuse and ask them to support you or go with you to the Gardai or police.
- If you can’t tell anyone that you know, you can speak with Samaritans. Samaritans is available 24 hours a day to provide confidential emotional support.
- If the abuser is someone you know and love, it can be very difficult to speak out against what’s happening. Remember that even if they are nice most of the time, abuse is illegal and you shouldn’t have to ever put up with it.
- Sometimes an abuser will threaten to harm you or someone you love if you tell anyone what’s happening. They might say things like “I’ll kill you if you say anything”, “Nobody will believe you”, “This is our secret” or “I’ll hurt your brother if you say anything”. These threats are a way of frightening you into silence. If you tell the Gardai or police they can make sure that you and other family members are safe from harm.
- If you don’t tell someone about the abuse it will probably continue.
- If the abuser is living in your home then you might need a temporary place to live in safety. There are refuges for victims of abuse and the Gardai or police will be able to help you. If you’re under 18 you can get help from social services.
- Telling someone you’re being abused doesn’t meant that you’ll be taken away from your family. Social services will try to work out a situation that means you are safe from abuse but still kept with your family.
- The women’s refuge can offer you emergency accommodation. Women's Aid provides support and information to women and their children who are being physically, emotionally and sexually abused in their own homes. A.M.E.N. provides a confidential helpline, a support service and information for male victims of domestic abuse.
- Even after the abuse has stopped you might have emotional or self-confidence problems. It might help to visit a counsellor.
If you need to talk to someone right now then contact one of these organisations for confidential support 24 hours a day- no matter your age or where you are.
Samaritans PHONE: 1850 609090
(Northern Ireland PHONE: 08457 909090)
Email: jo@samaritans.org
Web: www.samaritans.org
Samaritans provide confidential, non-judgemental support, 24 hours a day for people experiencing feelings of distress or despair, including those which could lead to suicide.
ChildLine FREEPHONE: 1800 66 66 66
Talk to ChildLine online.
Web: www.childline.ie
Childline is a 24-hour a day service for young people up to 18. Childline offer support to young people through their listening service over the phone and through the website. You can call Childline for a chat or to talk about any problems you might have.
See the Need help now? factsheet for information on some of the main support organisations and services available.
