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Emotional abuse
When someone threatens, teases, bullies, humiliates, intimidates, calls you worthless or betrays you.
Article by : SpunOut.ie
You might not realise that a friend is being emotionally abused because it doesn’t leave physical injuries. Instead it can leave you emotionally scarred. It happens when someone constantly threatens, teases, bullies, humiliates, intimidates, calls you worthless or betrays you.
Emotional abuse can damage you’re self-esteem or make you feel worthless or unloved. It can also be very frightening. Emotional abuse can affect you long after it’s stopped happening.
Emotional abuse can be:
- Someone always telling you that you’re worthless, stupid, or you’re not going anywhere in life. The criticism could come from a parent, family member, boss, teacher or someone your own age.
- If you’re threatened with violence or someone makes you feel frightened by what they say.
- Constant put downs about what you wear, your looks or what you do, even if they’re said as a joke.
- Very jealous and controlling behaviour, when someone tries to influence who you speak to, what you wear or who your friends are.
- Twisting the truth to make you feel guilty for things that aren’t your fault.
Escaping abuse
If you're in an abusive relationship or live with domestic violence then you need to get help and escape from the situation.
- Tell someone you trust about the abuse and ask them to support you or go with you to the gardai or police.
- If you can’t tell anyone that you know, you can speak confidentially with Samaritans.
- If the abuser is someone you know and love, it can be very difficult to speak out against what’s happening. Remember that even if they are nice most of the time, abuse is illegal and you shouldn’t have to ever put up with it.
- Sometimes an abuser will threaten to harm you or someone you love if you tell anyone what’s happening. They might say things like “I’ll kill you if you say anything”, “Nobody will believe you”, “This is our secret” or “I’ll hurt your brother if you say anything”. These threats are a way of frightening you into silence. If you tell the gardai or police they can make sure that you and other family members are safe from harm.
- If you don’t tell someone about the abuse it will probably continue.
- If the abuser is living in your home then you might need a temporary place to live in safety. There are refuges for victims of abuse and the gardai or police will be able to help you. If you’re under 18 you can get help from social services.
- Telling someone you’re being abused doesn’t meant that you’ll be taken away from your family, the social services will try to work out a situation that mean’s your safe from abuse but with your family.
- The women’s refuge or A.M.E.N. (for men) can offer you emergency accommodation.
- Even after the abuse has stopped you might have emotional or self-confidence problems. Visit a counsellor to help sort out your feelings.
